2 Hours

2 hours.

That's exactly how much time I get to spend with Kalaya on a daily basis.

It sucks.

I work for a tax software company and guess what time is drawing near? You got it- tax season.

I work 10 hours days and on Saturdays now.

It stinks.

Nothing makes you feel more like a terrible mother then only getting to see your child 2 hours a day. I already feel like other people raise her just by having her go to a babysitter every day--- this does not help the situation.

Not to mention she's got a raging sinus infection that makes her just miserable.

What can I do?

Well that list is most assuradly shorter then my " What I can't do" list.

That includes:

I can't get her ready in the morning and spend the extra time making her look cute and fixing her crazy-crazy hair. (which let's be honest- Daddy's were not made to fix hair. Cars- yes, maybe. Little girls hair, no)

I can't make sure that she's eating well which means limiting the Bug Juice drink daddy likes to buy her and making sure she doesn't try to sustain herself on applesauce and yogurt.

I can't make sure that the TV isn't on all day long putting senseless nonsense in her head. (we're 'no tv' people now if you can't tell. Being cheap actually pays off sometimes)

I can't wipe all the " cookies" out of her nose- as she calls them- and make sure her fever is down.

I can't make sure that she gets the right amount of discipline that is becoming necessary as a sweet little 3 year old begins to realize she is her own person.

I can't do anything.

I can give a kiss goodbye in the morning and a kiss hello in the evening- followed closely by being tucked snuggly in bed.

Every morning I have to explain to her that mommy has to work to pay for her sweet little girls house and toys. It just doesn't seem right to a 3 year old though. To them, mommys job is number one playmate, snack distributor, and boo-boo kisser. No one explained to her that some mommy's have some other things to do too.

God bless the stay-at-home mom's and the dad's that work so the mommy's can. Not all of us working mom, but this one in particular, wishes everyday she could do the job that you do.

I know Kalaya won't be warped because of this 3 to 4 month little space of time where I have to work these hours. Matter of fact, I know she won't ever remember it.

But, heavens to betsy! I sure will remember it and it sure does hurt.

All I want for Christmas is time.